Imagine you get a phone call from a friend who is an all-star employee. Maybe they are a family member of yours, a friend, a previous colleague, or even an acquaintance that you met and connected with.
Now, imagine further that this individual has had an incredible career and stellar reputation and left a previous position held for many years for the promise of working for an incredible company that is owned by a charismatic leader, for a better opportunity.
Let’s face it. We either have done this ourselves, or certainly know others who have left one position for the opportunity to grow at another.
The opportunity is taken, the new employee/team member is on-boarded with enthusiasm. The people in the department they were welcomed in starts to gel together. They are so happy to have this person join the team!
And Then…the Bully Boss Appears
But then the warnings start. “Watch out for the big boss….they love you now, but just wait.” This, of course, is followed by members in other departments who want to prepare the newbie so that the pedestal they were put on, and the promises that were made when they signed the new hire paperwork isn’t so high up that they fall and shatter their ability and motivation, into pieces.
It doesn’t take long. The bully in this workplace is the leader. This person yells and tells everyone who works there that they are stupid. They pace in front of them and tells them daily that if it weren’t for this leader, they would have nothing. They are never satisfied, are never grateful, never say thank you. And they certainly never ask how they can help.
Their expectations are unrealistic and don’t provide the tools necessary to their teams to get their jobs done. The team is underpaid. Their input isn’t valued. The leader seems to always be right—and everyone else is always wrong. The leader speaks under their breath about a person or group in front of them. They switch from bully to BFF when something is desperately needed. They traumatize every single person in the company.
Drama Triangle In the Worst Form
It’s the drama triangle in the worst form. The bully boss targets a victim—and the heroes try to protect the victim. Sounds great for productivity, right? NOT. So, in the end, the all-star is leaving after being victimized one too many times, and watching others be bullied is worse because they can’t be helped. Bruised, the all-star leaves for another opportunity and the revolving door continues for the bully boss.
In the end, we all have choices. We can always get our point across without bullying others. It’s everyone’s choice, but it’s not for a leader. You don’t have a choice here.
This article was originally published as Bully Bosses Bruise Bigtime at PEAR Core Solutions. Reprinted with permission.
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